Charles Ali

It was blinding. I didn’t think about life after football. It might sound crazy, but I thought I could play til I was 60, I never thought one day this will all be over. It was a hard transition for me, because I didn’t see it coming, I didn’t prepare for it mentally, spiritually, physically, or financially. I thought I would still have another check coming next Tuesday.

One of the things I faced was just not knowing. The unknown. That was huge for me. When I was growing up my parents had me write down goals, and at the age of 9 I wrote down 10 goals and completed 8 of them and was so excited. But now to have another chapter of my life, it was scary not knowing what to do. I felt like I had mastered and had gotten to the pinnacle of my career by making it to the NFL, but now I’m not in the NFL, so what’s next?

Older players, players that retired before me, transitioned before me, got me in tune to stay connected with other guys that had been through it, and through that I got connected with The Trust. My Program Manager, Ms. Foreman, is my big sister through the process. I probably harass her and call her a lot, but it's just because I want to be in tune with everything that’s going on.

I asked her who I should talk to about what I was going through, I asked if there was a certain person I should see. She shot me 8-10 references and went from there, they took care of the rest.

It was on a whim. One of my buddies was like, ‘Hey, I’m going to be in Atlanta, The Trust is having something,' and I was like, "Oh, I’ve seen that mentioned." I wasn’t planning on going, but I went and met a lot of great guys I didn’t know – guys that were older even. We swapped stories and I found out we were going through the same stuff, so that was big. Originally, I didn’t think The Trust would do much – I had heard through word of mouth from guys who went to other programs in the past that those programs didn’t follow through, so I thought what would make this different? But at the time I was like, "Hey, this is a time to meet and greet with the guys, so why not?"

I learned a lot about myself and my body through my brain and body assessment at UNC Chapel Hill and from there they told me I should seek out counseling. So, I did individual counseling as well as couples counseling through the Cigna Player Assistance Program. It was a unique experience to have that opportunity, because I’d never had counseling in my life. I never knew how much stuff would open up when I did it. I was crying the first session.

I had never been to counseling. I wasn’t raised with a "if you have a problem, let's go to counseling" type of mindset. But, I WAS raised to have an open mind and the counseling was a great experience for me. I would encourage everybody to go! Even if you don’t do the couples counseling, or go with your kids, you can just go by yourself. A lot of football players are like alpha males and it’s hard for us to open up. It’s been a mind-blowing opportunity to have those free sessions available to me.

The EXOS experience was a nice way to work out and get a higher level of burn. EXOS knows what your body can and can’t do. It’s a difference between the random guy who goes to the Y or LA Fitness versus the former NFL player – They know a little more hands-on about what we can and can’t do.

I went to the one in Dallas, and they gave me an outline/form at the end. I took that form to my PT and doctor and YMCA person and tried to set up a replica to match it. Sometimes it was easier for my PT. I felt like at least I have a guideline or plan and am not just drawing in dirt.

I feel like I have a plan. I do a lot of mentoring with kids, and the first thing I tell them is that you have to "see" it before you can see it come to pass, you have to envision it. So, I’m so happy that I have a plan and I can see it, and now it’s just about executing that plan.

The first thing I would tell a player is, 'You’re not alone – You’re not new.' I thought I was in my own category, nobody knows what I’m going through, I’m totally different from you guys, but the reality is most of us are going through the same things and have the same stories almost to a T.

I would tell other former players to reach out to others. Don’t be quiet about it. Never be embarrassed by it. Take the time you need to process. It’s a transition. When it’s over it's over, and it’s hard to transition, but once you do it's time to pick up and go, and it’s going to take as much work in the next field as it did in the last field.

I volunteer twice a week at the local YMCA, as well as my church, Berean Christian Church.

I love helping the kids at the YMCA, it brings me such joy! I remember when old players helped me as a kid in St. Louis, MO at the Matthews Dickey Boys and Girls Club. That's around the time when the Rams just moved into town and they had not yet gotten their own practice field yet so they used ours, it was great times. My faith is extremely important to me and spending time at the church and studying the Word has helped tremendously with that.

Wow! I have so many, but two are easy to talk about. One, the look on my mom, Charlina Gilkey's, face when I ran out the tunnel at the season opener (Cleveland vs Pittsburgh in 2007). It was her first NFL game. She always said to me as a kid, 'I won't go to a NFL game until you make it ALI.' And thats what she did. There were tears on both of our faces when I looked up in the stands and we locked eyes and winked as we had always done to one another in special moments.

The other moment is simple: I was the only rookie free agent to make the team even after the team had cut four draft picks!

One of the proudest moments since leaving football, hands down, is my new dedication to growing through Christ as well as being the best family man I can be! A ton of things were out of order when I played for all sorts of reasons, but I thank God that they are in the right order now!