Shaun Smith

I was gloomy at first because I didn’t know what was next. Since I was six years old, all I have been doing is football. When I realized that it was over with, I had to ask myself what was next. Do I coach? Do I try to be a mentor to guys? I was very indecisive.

I’ve been a little bit of everywhere with my transition. Has it been great? Yes and no, I’m not afraid to admit it. I went through a depression for a while – it was hard not knowing where my next big thrill is going to come from, that big adrenaline rush. You go from doing something all of your life, to quitting it cold turkey.

My birthday is August 19th, for all of my life my birthday hadn’t really meant anything to me because I was always at football practice. So now I’m getting in the full swing of understanding there is life after football. Football is just part of your life, you can’t play it forever.

My wife, I give it to her, my mood swings sometimes are not always the greatest. I show a lot of tough love. Being from New York, I’m not a lovey/touchy feely type of person and it’s hard. I’m still learning to be gentler. Even with having three girls you would think, he’s this big 385 lbs. guy, he must be mean. But really, I’m one of the nicest guys, I would give you the shirt off my back.

I called some coaches, my coach was like my dad in the football world. I used to talk to him about life, about being a dad, parenting skills, what to do, and not to do – Forget football, you can talk to anyone about football.

Yes and No. I think I was already against the odds being an undrafted guy. So, I was trying to make as much money as I could, because I was not promised to be here. If you are not guaranteed to be here you have more of a "let’s see how this is going to go" attitude.

The best thing you can do is enjoy yourself and network and look at each year as a plan to build better relationships. Learn from your coaches and your teammates. So as far as exiting the league, I need to continue to have a plan and stick with it. It's similar to how you take notes in meetings – write notes to yourself daily. This will allow you to have a better grip on life.

My advice to a lot of guys is to prepare as if you are transitioning every year, whether you are a rookie or a ten-year veteran. That’s the biggest thing, having a plan, having an exit strategy. Whether it be the NFL, the NBA, or for anything in life, you have to have an entrance and an exit strategy.

Put your pride away and go speak to someone else who’s been through it. I can’t go talk to some regular joe-blow who never played in the NFL because you will never understand what my life structure is. An NFL guy may have one or two friends outside of football, like his neighbors. You have to find guys who support you, that’s the best advice I can tell people. Deal with regular people and football people. So, you can see what regular people go through, and what other challenges you have to go through.

Through my depression, I really leaned on my wife and my mom and my kids. There were periods when I thought about taking my life, but I got some counseling and talked to different people. There were some guys at The Trust I talked to, like {Trust Captain} Demetric Evans, we played together, he’s someone I can lean on and talk to.

It’s been easy to access mental health resources. What guys don’t realize is all of the ways you can access benefits, through The Trust, The PA, Player Reps, other guys who have been through the same situation. It’s like when you are buying a car, you would ask a guy who’s had experience with that about what they did.

With The Trust, I went to Tulane for Brain and Body. I had been having anxiety. Dr. Stewart often checks in on me – When I get a call from a 504 number, I know it’s Tulane trying to check on me.

First thing I would tell them to do is pray. Pray, keep your faith, reach out to The Trust and see what it is. I’m not saying you have to agree with everything they have to offer, but reach out.

Go get the mental wellness check. They have the EXOS the Breakfast Club, go to it. It gets you back in the groove of working out and plus you get to meet former guys that you’ve never seen and you create comradery. You get to see what businesses they are in, so you can link up. You have to network and build relationships. You have to build relationships now, because then when you are done playing, it won’t just seem like you are calling to get a favor. When you have created that relationship when you call, they’ll say that’s great. They won’t just be thinking you only call when you need them for something.

I tell guys take advantage of it, the mental health resources. I didn’t realize I had depression, that I was bi-polar, or that I had bad anxiety. Just reach out, somebody’s going to hear your cry. When guys act out that’s what it is, a cry for help. Everyone just doesn’t go about it the right way.

At the time, I was still trying to play and {The Trust} offered you free gym workouts without having to pay. I was curious about Brain and Body and what was truly up with myself. So, I went to Tulane and saw Dr. Stewart. It was beneficial and helpful.

The Trust is a good thing, I tell people, anything that the NFL offers is good. Everybody else’s situation is not the same, they may need things that wouldn’t work for you. But who wouldn’t want to use The Trust?

Use The Trust! Use what you are trying to get to network. I’m not saying you are going to agree, I don’t agree with everything. Bahati knows that, everybody knows that, I’m different. Everybody has their own mind; different things work for different folks. I don’t have anything bad to say about it. I may gripe sometimes. You have to figure out the problem and then find the cause and effect. Most of the cause and effect is that guys don’t have a plan outside of football.

A typical day for me is I wake up around 6:15 every morning. I wake everybody up, I help get the girls ready for school. I consider myself an Uber driver for my kids now. The girls are pretty self-sufficient, they get themselves dressed. My wife makes them breakfast. I load the girls up in the car and drop them off where they need to go, then I go to the gym. Then I come back home and watch tv for a little while.

By that time, it’s 2:30 and time to pick the girls up from school. I take them to cheer, gymnastics or dance practice, whatever it is that day. I do some of the daddy duties around the house, I wash the clothes, I don’t clean as much as my wife would like me to. I feel like I’m a chauffeur, on a typical day I live through my kids now.

That’s the reason why I haven’t committed suicide or done anything, because my wife and kids are my life ... plus I have my mom and my brother. People look at me as a big strong guy, but really, I’m just like a giant teddy bear. I can be aggressive sometimes, I don’t mean It, it just gets delivered poorly sometimes. But I am a straight shooter. That’s a typical day.

It’s free. Go listen to what they have to offer. I think it will work for people especially guys that want to get their education, or to go into teaching. The more the word gets out there it will get better. I feel like a lot of guys confuse The Trust and the NFLPA. Some of the stuff do go hand in hand. Use each division and get something. Even if you just use The Trust for Brain and Body, use it. If you just want to use it for your education, use it.

You need to know what options you have, because a lot of guys don’t know what to do or where to start. They come to the Wraparound, like wow, I didn’t know all of this. Really you did know, when those emails come read them, rather than just opening them up and looking at the pictures.